2020 was an unpredictable year for all of us. There was no blueprint for the number of changes and uncertainties we experienced. COVID rocked us to our core, sending us into a spiral of confusion while changing every industry's landscape. It showed us inequities while also showing us the power of humanity. 2020 has encouraged many of us to find meaning in what we've lost. And now we're faced with making the best out of an unideal situation. We're left with the question, how do we feel about 2021? We can't just dump our dreams inside of a wastebasket then give up on ourselves.
Many of us are soaking in self-reflection, wondering how we can live better lives. Remember, you can't hold on and let go. You must choose one. So, in your pursuit of living a better life in 2021, it can help identify the obstacles that are keeping you from achieving it. Nobody knows the exact formula for achieving happiness, but there are some things that we can improve. I'm sure everyone has a top 10 list of things they wish they could change about themselves and their life.
Here are 4 toxic patterns to let go of and leave behind in 2020:
Being led by your fears.
Our anxieties have further depended on the amount of fear-mongering happening in the news, the messy politics, the lockdowns, the protests, and riots sparked by racial tensions. These issues won't be solved overnight, and we're not sure what 2021 has in store. Therefore, being led by your fears is one surefire way to prevent yourself from achieving your goals and seeing your very dreams come true.
Instead, accept uncertainty and understand that the element of mystery is a part of the human existence. Remember, what you place your focus, attention, and energy on, you will further magnify. So, instead of focusing on what scares you, focus on what invigorates you. Instead of focusing on the what-ifs, focus on what is. Be so busy chasing your dreams––that the sounds of fear are buried in the trunk of your car. Fear is locked away as you speed across the highway, top-down with the windows up.
Toxic work environments.
We understand that employment and financial stability are at the top of the list now more than ever––especially as we try to provide for ourselves and our families. But not at the expense of our mental health. Avoid any toxic conversations or relationships at work. Next, diligently create an exit plan. Planning an exit strategy will fuel your excitement and give you something to look forward to.
Superficial relationships.
If 2020 taught us anything, it showed us that we need community. Take a moment to re-evaluate your relationships. Whoever nourishes your soul can stay. Those who don't will have to exit stage left, right and whatever exits are left. Life is too short to hold on to relationships (this includes family), depleting your energy.
The best way to approach this is to begin to create boundaries. Start saying no and speak up about your wants and needs. Relationships and community are core to the human experience. Without them, it's possible to fall into isolation and despair. So cultivate those relationships that are worth cultivating and leave the toxic ones.
Perfectionism.
Perfectionism is masked fear. We've convinced ourselves that we want to get this right, or we want to make sure something is of high-quality when in reality it's deeply rooted in not feeling good enough. Perfectionism is the opposite of progress, and it's soaked in procrastination because deep down, it's further cemented in low-self-esteem and power image. Someone once told me done is better than perfect. Ask yourself, what can you put out there, messy and all?
Start. Nothing has to be perfect; it has to be authentic. If you're putting your heart and soul into a project, then those who will be impacted by it will connect with it. But, if you never put it out there, no one can experience the gifts and talents you possess. Let go of perfectionism. It no longer serves you.
We hope these 4 identifiable toxic patterns will help you start your New Year off in the right direction. 2021 is about putting into practice all that you learned in 2020. When you eliminate these negative things in your life, you create room for abundance and prosperity. You will gain the confidence you need to chase after your dreams while also improving your relationships.
Which one are you letting go of?
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